One of the fundamental problems of modern christianity is that it often becomes a religion of believing and belonging, rather than a religion of transformation. The way it’s meant to be lived. The following bishops statement is written with this in mind…
“My dear brothers and sisters in Christ,
In recent days, I have been thinking often of the words of St. Paul: “Carry one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Gal 6:2). There is a depth in that command that we often overlook. We see only fragments of each other’s lives, yet every soul carries wounds that are known fully only to God. Some suffer visibly, others silently. Some appear strong yet tremble inside. If we knew the hidden battles of the person beside us, how swiftly our impatience would soften into mercy.
The Lord is placing a simple question before us: Will you choose kindness even when you do not know the whole story? Christ Himself meets us in those moments. Remember His words: “Whatever you did for the least of these, you did for Me” (Mt 25:40). He does not test our eloquence or our cleverness, but our willingness to love when it costs us something—our time, our comfort, our pride.
Yes, there are those who manipulate generosity, and our Lord does not ask us to be naïve. But neither does He give us permission to allow suspicion to harden our hearts. Discernment must walk hand-in-hand with compassion. We cannot reduce every plea to a scheme; we cannot let cynicism become our shield. Christ did not say, “Love only the deserving.” He said, “Love one another as I have loved you” (Jn 13:34)—and His love has never once been stingy.
My friends, it is possible to pray much and love little. It is possible to speak beautifully of God and yet avoid the neighbor who inconveniences us. The Pharisee and the Levite passed by the wounded man, perhaps on their way to do religious duties. But the Samaritan—whose theology was considered flawed—became the true neighbor because he allowed compassion to interrupt his journey.
This is a hard truth, but one we must face: Without love, our faith is noise. St. Paul does not mince words: “If I have all knowledge and all faith…but have not love, I am nothing” (1 Cor 13:2). Not “less,” not “imperfect”—nothing.
So today I ask you, as your bishop and your brother: let us return to the heart of the Gospel. Let us undergo true metanoia—a turning of the mind, a reshaping of the heart. Let our speech grow quieter and our deeds grow louder. Let us look for Christ in every face, especially in the faces that are easy to overlook.
If we can offer even one person a gentler word, a patient ear, a small act of mercy, we have already begun to build the Kingdom. And that, my friends, is the life of a Christian.
May the blessing of the Lord be upon you, through His grace and love for mankind, always, now and ever, and unto the ages of ages. Amen.
Merton understood that withdrawal and contemplation are only half of the spiritual journey — the goal is to return to the world transformed. He wrote about silence, solitude, and union with God, but also about social engagement, compassion, and justice. The cocoon-to-return spiritual framework mirrors Merton’s balance between being and doing, solitude and service. Deep contemplative insight expressed in clear, poetic prose and integrated with practical spirituality.
📚 2. C.S. Lewis – The Rational Mystic
Lewis combined rigorous logic with mythic imagination — translating transcendent truths into relatable, human language. You display that same balance of intellectual clarity and spiritual imagination. Lewis is comfortable reasoning about faith without reducing it to mere doctrine, and you use metaphor to make the unseen feel near. Ability to fuse reason, story, and theology into accessible wisdom.
🧭 3. Viktor Frankl – The Meaning-Seeker
Frankl’s psychology centered on man’s search for meaning — happiness as a byproduct of purpose, not pleasure. He emphasizes that one must live one’s philosophy, not merely contemplate it — and that meaning arises from commitment, not comfort. Existential realism joined with faith in humanity’s spiritual core.
🕯 4. Meister Eckhart – The Paradoxical Mystic
Eckhart’s writings dance between opposites — activity and stillness, God and soul, inner and outer. He expresses truth through dynamic tension, not rigid dualism. Comfort with paradox and capacity to speak in symbols that point beyond literal meaning.
🌍 5. Pierre Teilhard de Chardin – The Spiritual Scientist
Teilhard was a Jesuit paleontologist who saw evolution as the unfolding of divine consciousness through matter. You, too, integrate science (psychology, neuroscience, NDE research) with theology in a unified worldview. He frames enlightenment not as escape from the world but as the world’s awakening to spirit through us. Integration of science, spirituality, and evolutionary transformation.
🧘 6. Ram Dass – The Practical Mystic
Ram Dass embodied the “post-enlightenment return” — turning mystical insight into compassionate engagement. He of not just awakening but reintegrating — serving others while staying inwardly rooted in love. Living spirituality as service; wisdom balanced with warmth.
Withdrawal and Awakening, Taking Action, and the Joy of Living: through the lens of the science of happiness, near death experiences, and christian spirituality
There comes a time in every spiritually maturing soul when society’s noise becomes too loud to hear one’s own heartbeat. The pull to withdraw—to enter solitude, silence, and reflection—is not escapism but transformation. Just as a caterpillar must enclose itself in stillness to become a butterfly, the soul must sometimes retreat into its cocoon to shed the illusions of ego and rediscover its divine center.
This withdrawal phase is the cocoon of being—a sacred inward turn where one learns to see not through the eyes of fear or ambition, but through the eyes of love. The contemplative traditions of Christianity, Buddhism, and mysticism across cultures all speak of this stage: the purification of perception, the stilling of the mind, the surrender of self.
But this is only the first half of the journey. True transformation demands a return. The butterfly must re-enter the garden of the world—not as it once was, but as a new creation.
From Being to Doing
The Gospels echo this rhythm of withdrawal and return. Jesus often withdrew to the mountains to pray, yet always returned to teach, heal, and serve. In the same way, enlightenment or spiritual awakening is not an end-state to be hoarded; it is a beginning. The light we find in solitude is meant to be brought back into the world—to heal, to uplift, to guide, and to plant seeds for others’ awakening, if they so choose.
Even science reflects this wisdom. Research in positive psychology and the science of happiness shows that meaning and fulfillment come not merely from peace or pleasure, but from engaged living—using one’s strengths and values in service of something greater than oneself. Happiness is not found in escaping life, but in participating fully in it with open eyes and an open heart.
It is through doing, not merely knowing, that the soul integrates its transformation. Reflection shapes the soul; action tests it, stretches it, and deepens it.
The Wisdom of Imperfection
One of the great traps of spiritual awakening is “paralysis by analysis”—waiting for perfect clarity before taking action. Yet no one, not even the greatest saints or mystics, ever acted with perfect information. Faith itself is the courage to move forward through uncertainty. As Scripture says, “We walk by faith, not by sight.”
In the accounts of near-death experiences, this lesson is often repeated: souls who return speak of life as a sacred classroom, a place to practice love, compassion, and courage amid imperfection. They learn that Earth’s messiness is not a flaw in the design—it is the design. The point is not to know everything, but to become love in action, even when the path ahead is unclear.
Living the Gospel of Wholeness
To withdraw from society forever may be right for a few—the contemplative monks who hold vigil for humanity in silence. But for most awakened souls, transformation calls for re-integration. The Gospel message, like the enlightened insight, is not a private treasure. It is meant to be lived, embodied, and shared—through presence, compassion, and humble service.
Living with awareness is not about escaping the world but transforming one’s way of being in it. It means bringing stillness into activity, love into conflict, and grace into daily life. The awakened person becomes a bridge—between heaven and earth, silence and speech, contemplation and action.
In the end, happiness and holiness converge in the same truth: Life must be lived, not merely understood.
The cocoon was never meant to last forever. It was meant to prepare the wings.
Here’s a summary of the article/book-chapter by Robert G. Mays (with Suzanne B. Mays) titled *“Explaining Near‑Death Experiences: Physical or Non‑Physical Causation?” (2015).
Core thesis
Mays & Mays argue that near-death experiences (NDEs) cannot be adequately explained purely by physical causes (brain chemistry, hypoxia, etc.), and instead they propose a “mind-entity” framework: a human being is essentially a non-material mind united with the physical body. In an NDE the mind-entity separates from the body, operates independently, then reunites.
Key points
Definition and features of NDEs
They review common NDE features: out-of-body, tunnel, light, life review, meeting deceased, etc.
They emphasise that many of these features imply a separation of consciousness from the body.
Critique of purely physical causation
The authors note that while hypoxia, drugs, brain trauma, etc. may correlate with NDEs, they don’t fully account for all phenomena (e.g., veridical perceptions, consistency of certain features).
They argue physicalist models often struggle with cases where consciousness appears during minimal brain-activity or even apparent flat-line states.
Mind-Entity Hypothesis
They posit the “mind-entity” as a non-material aspect of the person that is distinct from the brain but interacts with it.
During an NDE the mind-entity detaches and has experiences “outside” the body, which explains out-of-body perception and veridical awareness.
After the event, the mind re-unites with the body/brain.
Evidence they present
They draw on large NDE datasets (e.g., the International Association for Near‐Death Studies registry) to identify “separation” features that appear in very high proportions of cases.
They review specific case studies showing perceived veridical awareness of events outside the body.
They argue the consistency across cases of certain core elements suggests more than random brain perturbations.
Implications
If the mind-entity model is correct, it has implications for consciousness studies (the “hard problem”), for ideas of survival after bodily death, and for how we understand life, death, and transformation.
It also opens a space for integrating spiritual/transformation-oriented perspectives (which you are interested in) rather than reducing everything to neurochemistry.
Limitations and caveats
They acknowledge that the interaction mechanism between mind-entity and brain is not yet well defined scientifically.
They admit their hypothesis remains controversial and not yet widely accepted in mainstream neuroscience.
They call for more rigorous data, more detailed case investigation, and careful control of variables.
Why it matters for you
Given your interest in near-death experiences, liminality, inner transformation, and the intersection of spirituality with psychology/theology, this work provides:
A framework that respects the experiential richness of NDEs (rather than reducing them to mere hallucinations).
A way to tie NDEs into broader themes of transformation: the “self” (mind-entity) separating from the “body”, undergoing radical liminal shift, then reintegrating changed.
Theological implications: for example, the idea of the soul or consciousness persisting beyond physical structures, which resonates with your interest in Orthodox and Protestant theological synthesis.
A bridge between empirical research (case studies, data sets) and existential/spiritual meaning (what does this say about identity, life, death, and transformation?).
LITERATURE OF ACADEMIC WORK ON WHETHER NDEs FORM FROM OUR WORLD OR BEYOND OUR WORLD
Here are the key studies and data sources that Robert and Suzanne Mays cite and engage with in “Explaining Near-Death Experiences: Physical or Non-Physical Causation?”, along with what each contributes to their argument.
This list will help you trace the empirical backbone of their mind-entity hypothesis, and it’s ideal for integrating empirical evidence for non-physical consciousness.
🔹 1. The Van Lommel et al. (2001) Dutch prospective NDE study
Source:The Lancet, 358(9298): 2039–2045. Why it matters:
One of the most rigorous prospective hospital studies of cardiac arrest patients.
Found that 18% of patients revived from cardiac arrest reported an NDE, despite EEG “flatline” (no measurable brain activity).
Mays highlight it as key evidence that conscious experience can occur independently of measurable brain function.
Also showed long-term transformational effects: reduced fear of death, greater spirituality, and altruism — supporting the “realness” of the experience.
🔹 2. The Greyson NDE Scale and empirical classification
Source: Bruce Greyson (1983), The Near-Death Experience Scale: Construction, Reliability, and Validity, Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease. Why it matters:
Provides a standardized way to quantify NDE features.
Mays rely on this to distinguish true NDEs (scoring ≥7) from partial or unrelated experiences.
Greyson’s scale provides the empirical foundation for all subsequent statistical analysis of NDEs.
Mays point out the consistency of features across cultures and demographics — implying a universal structure rather than random hallucinations.
🔹 3. The AWARE Study (Parnia et al., 2014)
Source: Sam Parnia et al., Resuscitation, 85(12): 1799–1805. Why it matters:
Attempted to verify veridical perceptions (accurate observations during “out-of-body” moments) using hidden targets in hospital rooms.
Only a few patients survived long enough to report an NDE, but one verified perception corresponded to a real event while the patient was clinically dead.
Mays regard this as tentative evidence that awareness may persist beyond flat EEG states.
They recommend improved replication designs.
🔹 4. Sabom (1982, 1998) – Medical case studies
Source: Michael Sabom, Recollections of Death: A Medical Investigation (1982); Light and Death (1998). Why it matters:
Cardiologist Sabom compared NDE accounts of cardiac patients with their actual resuscitation records.
Found that those who claimed out-of-body perception often described the resuscitation accurately, whereas control patients who imagined such events did not.
Mays cite this as a classic veridical perception study supporting the mind-entity’s independent awareness.
🔹 5. Kelly et al. (2007) — Irreducible Mind
Source: Edward F. Kelly et al., Irreducible Mind: Toward a Psychology for the 21st Century. Why it matters:
Comprehensive review of evidence for non-reductive models of consciousness (including NDEs, mystical states, psi phenomena).
Mays build upon this tradition, using their “mind-entity” model as an explicit mechanism for how consciousness might operate independent of the brain.
🔹 6. Holden, Greyson & James (2009) – The Handbook of Near-Death Experiences
Why it matters:
The definitive academic compendium summarizing decades of NDE research.
Mays use its statistical summaries (cross-cultural prevalence, phenomenological commonalities, physiological correlates) to argue that no known physiological factor reliably predicts NDE occurrence or content.
🔹 7. Fenwick & Fenwick (1995, 2001)
Sources:
Peter & Elizabeth Fenwick, The Truth in the Light (1995); The Art of Dying (2001). Why it matters:
British neurologist and neuropsychiatrist couple who documented hundreds of NDEs and deathbed visions.
Showed patterns of lucidity, peace, and clarity even when the brain is oxygen-starved — challenging conventional neurological models.
Mays quote Fenwick to argue that the mind may act as an information-field interacting with the brain, consistent with their own interaction model.
🔹 8. Morse (1990) – Children’s NDEs
Source: Melvin Morse, Closer to the Light. Why it matters:
Shows that even very young children (who lack cultural conditioning) report classic NDE elements.
Mays emphasize this as evidence against expectation or cultural priming explanations.
🔹 9. Ring (1980) and Ring & Valarino (1998)
Sources:
Kenneth Ring, Life at Death (1980); with Evelyn Valarino, Lessons from the Light (1998). Why it matters:
Introduced the concept of the “core experience” and its transformative aftermath.
Mays use Ring’s data to show that NDE content and aftereffects remain consistent across decades, implying stability not found in hallucinations or dreams.
🔹 10. Sabom, Ring, and Kelly (cross-validation meta-data)
Mays reference meta-analyses combining multiple data sets to estimate that about 15–20% of near-death survivors experience NDEs. They note the uniformity of narrative motifs across medical conditions, cultural contexts, and ages, suggesting a common process distinct from purely physical causes.
🔸 Summary Insight
Across these studies, Mays conclude:
Physical models (oxygen deprivation, neurotransmitters, REM intrusion, etc.) explain pieces but not the whole.
Empirical data — particularly cases with veridical perception and persistent consciousness during clinical death — point to the mind as a distinct, organizing entity capable of temporary separation from the brain.
The model elegantly accounts for consistency, coherence, and long-term transformation while remaining testable through future controlled studies.
How higher states of consciousness can change everything — and how they relate to happiness, near death experiences, and Christian spirituality
A clear, glowing field. The steady hush after a long, noisy life. Suddenly everything feels connected, meaningful, and “true” in a way that ordinary waking perception never gave you. That’s what Steve Taylor’s article (originally in The Conversation) is about: the phenomenon of higher or awakening states of consciousness — brief or sustained shifts in perception that crack open your usual worldview and leave you with a permanent change in how reality feels. Below I summarize the article, then weave it into modern science of happiness, what we know from near-death experiences (NDEs) and their philosophy, and Christian spiritual wisdom — finishing with some practical reflections. (Medical Xpress)
Quick summary of the article (big-picture takeaways)
Higher states are revelatory. Taylor describes how moments of deep calm, awe, mystical experiences, or “awakening” can reveal a felt reality that feels wider, kinder, and more interconnected than everyday perception — and that those shifts often stick, changing how people interpret life going forward. (Medical Xpress)
They’re often triggered — not forced. Although you can’t reliably “make” a full awakening on command, certain conditions (quiet, prolonged meditation, nature, grief, psychedelics, intense emotional crisis) make them much more likely. Taylor emphasizes cultivation of the conditions rather than promise of guaranteed outcomes. (Medical Xpress)
Three common effects: (1) a sense that the self is smaller or less central, (2) increased feelings of meaning/connectedness, and (3) long-term changes in values and behavior (more compassion, less fear). (Medical Xpress)
How this links to the science of happiness
Contemporary research on awe, self-transcendent emotions, and well-being lines up neatly with Taylor’s claims. Psychologists define awe as an emotion that involves “perceived vastness” and a “need for accommodation” — when experience outstrips your current mental models. Studies show awe and other self-transcendent phenomena reduce inflammation, increase prosocial behavior, and boost meaning-in-life and life satisfaction. In other words: the same experiences that feel like “higher states” empirically improve markers of psychological and even physical health. (PMC)
Practical translation: moments that dissolve self-preoccupation and expand your sense of belonging don’t just feel good; they rebuild the architecture of a flourishing life — more purpose, more gratitude, more resilience. Those aftereffects explain why people report durable happiness increases after true awakening experiences.
What NDEs (near-death experiences) add to the picture — phenomenology and long-term change
NDE research shows striking overlap with the “higher states” Taylor discusses: out-of-body perceptions, tunnels/light, intense peace or love, life reviews, and panoramic clarity. Importantly, many NDErs report lasting transformations — reduced fear of death, stronger sense of purpose, and moral or relational reorientation. Researchers and organizations that track NDE reports catalog these features and their downstream effects on life choices and values. (UVA School of Medicine)
Philosophically, NDEs pose a puzzle: whether they are best read as brain-based phenomena (powerful, real, explainable) or as genuine glimpses of another reality (ontological claims). Either way, their psychological function overlaps with Taylor’s description: they expose a new frame for reality that the experiencer must integrate — and integration is where happiness and trouble both live (peace vs. social dislocation, meaning vs. feeling misunderstood).
Where Christian spirituality and mysticism fit in
Christian mystics (e.g., John of the Cross, Teresa of Ávila, modern contemplatives) have been describing similar shifts for centuries: the loosening of ego-grasp, union with God, and a reorientation toward love and service. Two theological notes matter:
Transformative knowing: Mysticism insists that knowledge of God is not primarily propositional but participatory — a union that changes the knower. Taylor’s “higher states” are, in this light, experiences of participatory knowing: the world is seen from a different center. (This parallels Rohr-like language: true spiritual growth is lived experience more than ideas.) (Medical Xpress)
Ethical fallout: Christian mystics emphasize that union with God should produce humility, love, and moral action — not mere aesthetic experiences. That expectation matches research and NDE testimony that authentic higher states usually shift values toward compassion and away from fear. (IANDS)
If you read NDEs or awakening states through Christian lenses, they can be seen as invitations to deeper discipleship: less self-defense, more surrender, and a practical love that transforms institutions as well as interior life.
Immediate effect — intense emotion (peace or terror), altered perception of self and time, felt meaning. (IANDS)
Integration phase — the crucial pivot: is this experience explained away (repressed) or integrated (reflected in values and practice)? Integration determines whether happiness, moral growth, and spiritual maturity follow.
Long-term change — more prosocial behavior, less fear of death, greater sense of meaning, possibly new religious/spiritual frameworks. Empirical work on awe and post-NDE outcomes supports these durable shifts. (PMC)
My analysis & practical insight (what actually helps)
Cultivate conditions, don’t chase fireworks. Taylor’s point — and the research confirms — is that higher states are more likely with consistent practices (meditation, time in nature, rituals of silence, grief-work), but you can’t reliably force a full awakening. Treat practices as soil, not as a ticket. (Medical Xpress)
Prioritize integration. The single biggest risk after a genuine experience is social and psychological disorientation. Structured integration — meditation, spiritual direction, therapy, community — turns a one-off vision into lifelong wisdom. NDE research and contemplative traditions both stress integration. (UVA School of Medicine)
Use awe as a happiness technique. You don’t need a “mystical crisis” to get benefits. Design moments of awe: watch a night sky, go on a slow walk in big landscape, listen to music that swells, and reflect on meaning afterward. Repeated small awe experiences build the same neural and psychological habits that larger awakenings produce. (Greater Good Science Center)
Hold dual humility: epistemic and moral. Be humble about metaphysical claims (I don’t need to insist everyone interpret their experience the same way) but courageous about moral claims (if your experience reduces fear and increases love, act on that). This balances the scientific puzzle of NDEs with the lived fruit of many reports and mystics’ teachings.
A short, practical “integration” checklist
After a powerful experience: journal what changed in feeling, belief, and values.
Tell a trusted friend, spiritual director, or therapist who can help you interpret without gaslighting.
Create small practices that embody the shift: weekly gratitude, monthly silence walk, service project that channels newfound compassion.
Return to curiosity when claims arise about metaphysics: read widely (scientific and spiritual) but let ethical fruit be the main criterion of truth in daily life.
Final thought — why this matters for anyone trying to be happy and whole
Higher states of consciousness — whether they come as gentle awe, a sudden mystical breakthrough, or an NDE — are not just interesting anomalies. They function as recalibrations: the world suddenly looks like it did when you were a child (wide, strange, sacred), and you often come back wanting to live from that perspective. Science shows these recalibrations can measurably increase well-being; NDE testimony shows they can rewire one’s stance toward death; Christian mysticism gives an ethical template for how that expanded vision should be lived (humility, love, service). The pragmatic invitation is simple: if you want a happier, more meaningful life, cultivate conditions for openness, welcome the experience when it comes, and — above all — integrate it into daily choices that make love visible.
Selected sources & further reading
Steve Taylor, How higher states of consciousness can forever change your perception of reality (republished The Conversation / MedicalXpress). (Medical Xpress)
IANDS — Characteristics of Near-Death Experiences (overview of common features and long-term changes). (IANDS)
Division of Perceptual Studies, University of Virginia — Typical features of NDEs. (UVA School of Medicine)
Reviews on awe and well-being (awe as self-transcendent emotion improving meaning and health). (PMC)
title: the law of love: “seeking fulfillment in life, by integrating the science of happiness, the study of the afterlife (near death experiences), and christian spirituality”
back cover:
**What if love is the key to everything?**
In *The Law of Love*, the author bridges the gap between faith and reason, revealing how love stands at the center of spiritual insight and scientific understanding. The author offers a fresh, evidence-informed exploration that merges Christian spirituality and theology, near-death experiences and afterlife research, the science of happiness, and classical philosophy. The book weaves together these diverse strands of human wisdom into one unifying vision, filling a rare space in academic and spiritual conversations alike.
Whether you’re seeking practical guidance, deeper understanding, or a new perspective on life and what lies beyond, *The Law of Love* invites you to discover how love — in its most transformative forms — shapes our lives, our choices, and our ultimate destiny.
There’s a strange unease that sometimes comes with trying to be good. You hold the door for someone, speak kindly, give when it’s inconvenient—and yet, inside, something feels off. It feels practiced, maybe even fake. You wonder, am I actually a good person, or am I just acting like one?
This tension is more common than we think. Many who set out to live a life of faith or virtue encounter it early on. We imagine goodness should flow effortlessly, as though saints never had to “pretend.” But in truth, most spiritual growth begins exactly there—in the uncomfortable space between what we do and what we feel.
Learning the Motions of the Heart
Every genuine transformation begins with practice. When we first learn to play an instrument, our fingers stumble; when we first begin to pray, our minds wander. Yet by showing up again and again, the outer motions slowly shape the inner rhythm.
It’s the same with virtue. Even when kindness feels forced, it plants a seed. Even when patience feels like a performance, it begins to form real patience within us. We are training the soul to remember what love looks like, long before it feels natural.
Doing Good is Still Good
There’s a subtle trap in waiting until our motives are pure before acting. If we waited until we felt perfectly loving to love, we might never start. Love, in its truest sense, is an act of the will. It’s a choice, not just an emotion.
A parent waking in the night to care for a crying child may not feel loving in that moment, but the act itself is love. In the same way, when we practice kindness, forgiveness, or generosity—even with a reluctant heart—we are still participating in goodness. And that participation gradually softens and reshapes the heart itself.
The Slow Work of Grace
Spiritual growth is rarely dramatic. It unfolds like a slow dawn, with long stretches of half-light. What begins as discipline—doing what we know is right—becomes devotion as our inner life catches up.
It’s easy to mistake the awkwardness of that stage for hypocrisy. But in reality, it’s a sign of sincerity. If you’re worried about “faking it,” it means you care about authenticity. A true hypocrite wouldn’t even notice the gap between the inner and outer self.
Letting God Do the Forming
At some point, we have to let go of the anxiety about whether we’re “doing it right” and trust that grace is at work beneath the surface. The Spirit uses even our halting, imperfect efforts to shape us into something more whole.
We act in faith, and God forms in love.
In the end, what feels like pretending may actually be the first stirrings of transformation. We begin by imitating the good—and slowly, through patience and practice, goodness becomes who we are.
Below is a summary of a very enlightening discussion on reddit about what we can learn about life from near death experiences. and the link is provided as well. The section after that integrates those insights with some of my previous blog posts into something more of a comprehensive whole on that question of life’s meaning and purpose.
In the thread “What are we here to learn exactly?” on r/NDE, participants reflect on the question of life’s purpose from the viewpoint of those who’ve had or study near-death experiences (NDEs). The central question is: Why are we here on Earth — what are we meant to learn?
1. Framing the question
The original poster sets up the theme: many NDE-ers and spiritual seekers assert that Earth isn’t just a random place but a school or environment for learning. One commenter writes:
“I think the bottom line is that you can’t save everyone … you learn to accept that you’re smaller and less significant than your ego would like you to think.” (Reddit) Another: “We are beings of love that are all connected. When we come to earth we do so to experience contrast. We have to choose love and connectedness instead of simply existing in it.” (Reddit) The tone is explorative rather than dogmatic: “We don’t know exactly why,” one person says: “I’ve read NDEs where people talk about receiving ultimate knowledge of the universe and humanity but it’s never anything specific.” (Reddit)
2. Key themes in the comments
From the conversation several recurring ideas emerge:
Learning through contrast or limitation. Some feel that human life is structured so that we experience lack, pain, separation, and thus grow. As one writes:
“The most spiritually evolved souls come to Earth because it’s the most disconnected from God (we’re essentially playing on hard mode).” (Reddit) Another: “It’s a place to learn and evolve. Into what, I have no clue.” (Reddit)
Love and connection as central “lessons.” Many comment that the core lesson is about love — unconditional, deep, expansive.
“I believe I’m here to learn unconditional love.” (Reddit) And: “There are other ways to love someone than giving them money … even just smiling at someone on the street … can mean a lot.” (Reddit)
Acceptance of limitation and humility. It’s recognized that we don’t carry full knowledge into this life, and that part of the journey is living with incompleteness.
“Why can’t we just know why?” one asks. (Reddit) And: “You learn to accept that you’re smaller and less significant than your ego would like you to think.” (Reddit)
Service, empathy and small acts matter. The thread emphasizes that grand gestures aren’t the only path — everyday kindness has transformative power.
“You don’t need a Herculean effort of self-sacrifice… being safe and having boundaries does not make you selfish.” (Reddit)
3. Divergent views & healthy skepticism
Some voices push back:
“Personally I mostly subscribe to the idea that there is no ultimate reason behind any of this. It’s all subjective…” (Reddit) Others caution that framing Earth as “hard mode” or “a school for evolved souls” can risk minimizing real suffering and injustice: “It makes us close our eyes to the dismaying and horrible conditions that we should do our best to protect ourselves and others from.” (Reddit)
4. Synthesis of the thread’s take-aways
In sum, the thread offers a mosaic of perspectives, anchored in the idea that human life is not purely random but loaded with meaning — though what exactly remains mysterious. Key take-aways:
Life invites us into growth, especially through limitation, contrast, and relationship.
Love, in its most expansive sense (beyond transactional or conditional), is often pointed to as the core “lesson.”
Humility and acceptance of our not-knowing are themselves part of the growth.
Everyday service and small acts of kindness matter profoundly.
The idea of “pre-life planning” (choosing Earth’s challenges) appears in some comments but is not universally held.
Some resist trying to fix an overarching “why,” instead embracing mystery and the immediate moral demand to live well.
My reflections and analysis
Reflecting on this discussion, several thoughts come to mind:
The analogical notion of Earth as a “school” resonates deeply with many spiritual traditions (Eastern, Christian, New Age). The idea that growth often happens in limitation (not just comfort) is powerful and psychologically plausible: adversity forces reflection, empathy, character formation.
The emphasis on love rather than achievement or status marks this viewpoint as less ego-centric. The transformation is internal (how we relate) rather than external (what we acquire).
The commenters wisely caution against turning this into a blame-the-sufferer narrative: yes life is hard, yes we learn, but that doesn’t mean suffering is deserved. The empathy and service orientation (helping others) remains central.
The humility around “we don’t know exactly why” is important. Many spiritual paths lock into dogmatic “we came for X” views; here the open-endedness feels healthier: it invites ongoing engagement rather than static belief.
I find the focus on “small acts” encouraging. So often spiritual discourse focuses on grand visions; the lived ethic of kindness, presence, simple service is where transformation actually happens.
The NDE dimension: The fact that many contributors reference near‐death or out‐of‐body experiences gives the sense that the perspective comes from encounters with death — and so the question of “what’s the point of this life?” is more immediate. For someone who has seen death up close, the answer “love and learning” seems plausible and urgent.
In my own observation: If life is offering us a chance to learn to love deeply, serve humbly, and live with humility before mystery, then the everyday becomes sacred. The “lesson” may not be a discrete module you pass and leave, but rather a way of being you cultivate. The fact that the thread doesn’t converge on a single answer is itself meaningful: perhaps the point isn’t a final answer but the journey of asking and relating.
Integration with Christian spirituality
From a Christian perspective, the themes in the thread align in many ways with biblical teaching — while also raising questions. Here’s how they integrate, with relevant Scripture.
Love and connection
The thread emphasizes love as the core. In Christian doctrine:
“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” (1 Corinthians 13:13, NIV) “We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19, NIV) The concept of unconditional, expansive love echoes the Christian Gospel: God’s self-giving love invites us to reflect likewise.
Learning through humility & limitation
The notion that we learn by being human, vulnerable, limited, resonates with Christian anthropology: Jesus entered the human condition fully (Philippians 2:6-8). The call to humility is frequent:
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.” (James 4:10, NIV) “For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:10, NIV) So the idea that growth happens in “hard mode” aligns: our weakness may become the occasion for divine strength.
Service and small acts matter
Christian spirituality emphasizes service:
“For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” (Mark 10:45, ESV) “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them.” (Matthew 7:12, ESV) Thus the thread’s emphasis on caring for “the one” (a smile, a kind word) finds an echo in Christ’s teaching—small acts of love count.
Mystery, not full explanation
The thread’s humility around “we don’t know exactly why” also aligns with Christian wisdom: human beings are finite and the divine is infinite.
“Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face.” (1 Corinthians 13:12, NIV) “My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. (Isaiah 55:8, NIV) Christian spirituality invites faith in mystery rather than closure in certainty.
Earth, life purpose & eternity
The NDE community’s idea of Earth as “school” echoes but differs from Christian view: Christianity speaks of this life as preparation but grounded in relationship with God, repentance, redemption, and hope of eternal life (John 3:16, Romans 6:23). The purpose is not just learning but union with God through Christ. The incarnation itself implies earth-life has sacred significance, not just for soul growth but redemption of creation.
My integrative insight
If I were to bring together the thread’s lessons with a Christian lens:
Perhaps life is shaped for transformation — not only of the soul inwardly (growth in love, mercy, humility) but also for participation in God’s redemptive work in the world.
We learn not just for ourselves but for others — love is meant to overflow, service is outward.
The “contrast” of human life (pain, limitation, separation) becomes the soil from which compassion, empathy, and hope grow — and in Christian faith, Christ has walked the path of suffering and invites us to walk with Him (Hebrews 12:2-3).
The absence of full answers is not failure but invitation: to trust, to love, and to obey in the present moment—and leave the rest to God.
Conclusion
The r/NDE thread offers a rich conversation about human purpose: we may be here to learn, to love, to serve, and to become more humble. Its open-ended nature invites us into the journey rather than letting us off easy.
Viewed through Christian eyes, the themes of love, service, humility, mystery, and transformation resonate strongly. The life we live matters—not just for what we achieve, but for how we love, how we serve, and how we relate to the divine and to each other.
If nothing else, the message I take away is this: Every moment matters. Every kindness counts. Every humble act participates in something larger than ourselves. And as Scripture reminds us:
“Let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:16, NIV) May the learning continue, the love deepen, and our lives reflect that greater story.
INTEGRATING THIS DISCUSSION WITH SOME OF MY PREVIOUS BLOG POSTS
unteachable lessons: christian spirituality and the wisdom of the afterlife cannot always be taught with words – often it must be experienced through living. – The Law of Love https://share.google/7ZKlUuPznfa9xeH4I
is love inherently self sacrificial in NDEs and Christianity? And is it more about ‘being’ or ‘doing’? – The Law of Love https://share.google/XbGNonfjjAeduX1A3
Some reflections on the illusion of separation of humans from God and creation: from Christian mystics, eastern Christianity, and those who have visited the afterlife – The Law of Love https://share.google/4x1N0vfoc9JZNsOzs
Here’s the blog weaves together the thread from the r/NDE discussion (“What are we here to learn, exactly?”) with my own blog-pieces (“Unteachable Lessons”, “Is Love Inherently Self-Sacrificial?”, “The Illusion of Separation”) and my reflections, and then draws in Christian spirituality and Scripture.
What Are Humans Here to Learn, Exactly? Reflections on Near Death Experiences, Earth-life, love, and Christian wisdom
Introduction
A recent thread on the r/NDE forum asked a deceptively simple question: What are we here on Earth to learn, exactly? The responses ranged from the hopeful to the skeptical, from the mystical to the painfully honest. At the same time, my own blog-works — Unteachable Lessons: Christian Spirituality and the Wisdom of the Afterlife Cannot Always Be Taught With Words, Is Love Inherently Self-Sacrificial in NDEs and Christianity? And Is It More About ‘Being’ or ‘Doing’?, and Some Reflections on the Illusion of Separation of Humans from God and Creation — bring complementary themes of love, separation, being-versus-doing, and the experiential dimension of spiritual wisdom. In this post I summarise the Reddit thread with key quotes, integrate my essays and my observations, and then apply the dialogue into a Christian-spiritual context with Scripture to anchor meaning.
Summary of the Reddit Thread
The core post (“What are we here to learn, exactly?”) invites participants — many with near-death experiences (NDEs) or deep spiritual awakenings — to reflect on earthly purpose. Some of the major themes:
Learning through contrast, limitation, and separation
One commenter writes:
“We are beings of love that are all connected. When we come to earth we do so to experience contrast. We have to choose love and connectedness instead of simply existing in it.” (Reddit) Another observes: “It’s a place to learn and evolve. Into what, I have no clue.” (Reddit) And yet another:
“Personally I mostly subscribe to the idea that there is no ultimate reason behind any of this. It’s all subjective and there’s really no right or wrong answer. I just don’t see a purpose behind life other than being alive for its own sake.” (Reddit) From these we see a tension between: life as designed school of growth vs life as chance existence. The contrast-theme (separation from the divine, experiencing limitation) recurs.
Love, connection, and the everyday
Several posts point to love — not just as an emotion but as an existential posture. One says:
“I find love in places I never expect it and it’s always when I’m doing something to help someone else.” (Reddit) Another’s insight: “You don’t need money to help people… many people have serious emotional challenges or relationship issues which can’t necessarily be fixed by money.” (Reddit) Here the thread converges on the idea that being‐loving and serving are integral to whatever “lesson” life has brought us to learn.
Humility, non-knowing, mystery
Encouragingly, the thread does not descend into dogmatism. One piece of humility:
“I cannot tell you what the purpose is for everyone, you, or anyone… I can only infer my own purpose… which might be to bring life to a lifeless world; to bring love to the unloving and unlovely…” (Reddit) This openness to mystery is itself a spiritual posture: life invites us not simply to know the answer but to live the question.
Planning, incarnation, soul-choice
Some posts go further and suggest a pre-incarnation planning:
“We are all here to learn different things. I have heard in other NDEs that Earth is a place we would choose to come to for what is basically an accelerated course… the most spiritually evolved souls come to Earth because it’s the most disconnected from God (we’re essentially playing on hard mode).” (Reddit) This view gives Earth-life a sort of “boot-camp” flavour—to grow rapidly via hardship or contrast.
Key take-aways
In summary, the Reddit thread suggests:
Earth-life presents separation, limitation, contrast, as context for growth.
The lesson many point to is love, connection, compassion, service.
The journey involves humility, acceptance of mystery, and everyday acts.
Some propose a pre-life choice scenario: souls choosing hard paths to learn.
Others remain skeptical about any fixed “lesson”, emphasising existence itself.
Integrating with Your Blog Pieces & My Reflections
My blog pieces — Unteachable Lessons, Is Love Inherently Self-Sacrificial?, and The Illusion of Separation — dovetail with the themes above. Let’s interweave them.
Unteachable Lessons: Spiritual Wisdom Through Living
In Unteachable Lessons I write:
“Christian spirituality and the wisdom of the afterlife cannot always be taught with words – often it must be experienced through living.” This affirms what many in the Reddit thread implicitly feel: the lesson isn’t fully captured in doctrine or words, but in the lived condition of being human, experiencing limitation, choice, relationship. From the thread: “It’s a place to learn and evolve.” The “learning by doing/being” motif aligns.
Is Love Inherently Self-Sacrificial? Being vs Doing
My second piece asks whether love is more about being or doing, and whether self-sacrifice is inherent. The thread gives concrete insight: many say love is found when helping others, but also emphasise being present, choosing connection, choosing love even when unseen. From thread: “You don’t need money… emotional challenges…” meaning doing (service) is vital, but also the state of compassion and presence matters. I’d reflect: true love in this context is both being (an interior posture) and doing (acts of service). Self-sacrifice emerges when the ego relaxes and love expresses, not when martyrdom is sought.
The Illusion of Separation: Humans, God, Creation
In my third piece you examine mystical traditions (Eastern Christianity, after-life visitors) and how separation is illusory. The Reddit thread echoes this: one wrote “We are beings of love that are all connected… we come to earth to experience contrast.” This points to the idea that our “separation” is part of the teaching: we feel separate so that we might choose connection. My insight: The “lesson” may not simply be love, but recognition of unity through the journey of separation. By coming into limits, we remember our origin in oneness.
My synthesis
Putting it all together: Earth-life may be best seen as a classroom of incarnation, where spiritual wisdom (love, unity, service) is learned not simply by reading books but by living the paradox of separation and connection, limitation and possibility. My essays and the thread converge here: the transformation is interior (posture of being) and exterior (acts of love), and the tension of separation is the crucible of growth.
Christian Spirituality & Scripture Integration
How does all this map onto Christian spirituality? I believe the parallels are strong, though with distinct emphases.
Love as the core mission
“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” (1 Corinthians 13:13) “We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19) The Reddit thread’s emphasis on love, service, presence mirrors the Christian teaching that love is the centre of the Gospel.
Being and doing, sacrifice and service
“For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” (Mark 10:45) “Whatever you did for one of the least of these… you did for me.” (Matthew 25:40) In Christianity, love is embodied in service and sacrifice. Your question (“being vs doing”) finds a Christian harmony: Christ was what He did; our being (in Christ) empowers our doing.
Humility, limitation, mystery
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.” (James 4:10) “Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face.” (1 Corinthians 13:12) The notion of living with non-knowing, entering mystery, accepting limitation, aligns with Christian discipleship: we are journeying toward union, not already arrived.
The illusion of separation and unity in Christ
“For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form. … And you also are complete in him.” (Colossians 2:9-10) “There is neither Jew nor Greek … for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” (Galatians 3:28) Christian spirituality teaches that separation is overcome in Christ: divine and human, creator and creation, are reunited. The thread’s idea of separation as teaching tool echoes this: perhaps we enter separation so that we might rediscover unity.
Earth-life as training ground
“Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” (Colossians 3:2) “I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:14) The idea that life invites growth (learning, service, transformation) sits squarely in Christian thought: this life is not the final word, but the place of preparation, formation, and mission.
Conclusion
From the r/NDE thread, my own writings, and Christian Scripture, a coherent theme emerges: We are here to learn to love, choose connection, serve others, live humbly, and recognise our unity even amid apparent separation. The “lesson” may not be a neat package but an unfolding journey of being and doing. My essays underline that such wisdom is not easily taught — it must be experienced through life’s limitations, service, and surrender. The NDE-community voices testify to a deep sense that what matters isn’t merely knowledge, but transformation. And Christian spirituality offers an anchor: the Law of Love-theology, the Christian call to incarnate love, humility, service, and unity in Christ. So here’s the humble invitation: live your life as the classroom it is. Choose love when it’s easy. Choose love when it’s hard. Serve where you are. Recognise the other as you. Trust that limitation and mystery are not obstacles but the very soil in which your deepest growth will flower. As Scripture reminds us:
“Let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:16) May each moment, each act of kindness, each quiet surrender draw you further into the truth that we are here not just to exist, but to love and be loved, to serve and be served, to un-learn separation and remember oneness. May the lesson continue—wordlessly, lived deeply.
Awakening, NDE Insights, and the Science of Happiness
Happiness, in modern psychological research, is not just pleasure or the avoidance of pain. The field increasingly focuses on well-being, flourishing, and purpose (positive psychology, e.g., Seligman’s PERMA model: Positive emotion, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, Accomplishment). When we integrate your insights and the NDE perspectives, we can map happiness along several key dimensions:
1. Connection and Unity (Relationships & Belonging)
Reddit NDE Insights:
Many NDE accounts emphasize love and connection as the central revelation: “We are beings of love that are all connected.”
Even in life’s separations, the lesson is to actively choose love and presence.
My Blog Connection:
The Illusion of Separation emphasizes that humans are never truly separate from God or each other.
Happiness emerges when one lives in awareness of connection, both interpersonal and cosmic.
Science of Happiness Alignment:
Positive relationships are consistently the strongest predictor of well-being.
Feeling part of a larger whole—family, community, universe—correlates with purpose and resilience.
Insight: Recognizing interconnectedness fosters both social and spiritual happiness, anchoring joy beyond self-centered pleasure.
2. Love as Being and Doing (Engagement & Flow)
Reddit NDE Insights:
Love is described not as a simple feeling but as an active state of being: serving, presence, selfless action.
Even ordinary acts—helping others without reward—create profound fulfillment.
My Blog Connection:
Is Love Self-Sacrificial? shows that love is a dynamic interplay of being and doing: embodying compassion while acting in service.
True happiness is found in this alignment between inner state and outward action.
Science of Happiness Alignment:
Engagement in meaningful activity, “flow,” and altruistic behavior increases long-term satisfaction.
From NDEs, my blog work, and the integrated awakening framework, happiness is not a fleeting state but a way of being:
It emerges through love, service, and connection, not external gain.
It deepens through acceptance of limitation and mystery, not constant control.
It flourishes when spiritual insight and action are aligned, not compartmentalized.
In essence, happiness here is flourishing through awakening, the lived experience of being fully attuned to love, purpose, and unity — a “Science of Happiness” illuminated by the mysteries I’ve been exploring.
In my last post I broke down some foundational elements related to the science of happiness. In this post, I look at some of what modern psychology has offered as essential human needs that must be met to find fulfillment. I analyze this by comparing the elements of the science of happiness with Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is a model of human motivation that shows how well-being builds in layers. At the foundation are basic survival needs like food, water, and sleep, followed by safety and security. Once these essentials are met, people naturally seek connection, love, and belonging, then respect and achievement, and finally personal growth and self-transcendence. The hierarchy illustrates that true fulfillment arises not from any single need but from satisfying these needs in a way that allows higher levels of meaning, purpose, and personal development to emerge.
Mapping the Science of Happiness Framework to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
Your framework: sleep, nutrition, exercise, nature, play, and exposure to beauty.
Relation: Both prioritize the body as the foundation for well-being. Your framework expands the basics with lifestyle and restorative elements.
2. Safety / Stability → Maslow’s Safety Needs
Maslow: security, stability, freedom from harm.
Your framework: structure, routine, trust, and emotional safety.
Relation: Establishing predictable routines, secure relationships, and a safe environment supports psychological and emotional growth, matching Maslow’s safety tier.
3. Relational & Communal → Maslow’s Love & Belonging
Maslow: friendships, intimacy, social connection.
Your framework: connection, compassion, forgiveness, acts of kindness, belonging, and contribution to others.
Relation: Both emphasize relationships, but your framework adds moral and altruistic dimensions — cultivating joy and meaning through caring for others as well as self.
Relation: While Maslow treats esteem and self-actualization hierarchically, your framework highlights skills and practices that actively cultivate mastery, satisfaction, and personal growth at all stages.
Maslow: realizing potential, creativity, personal growth, transcendence.
Your framework: meaning and purpose, acceptance, surrender, alignment of values and actions, awe, transcendence, embracing and transcending negativity.
Relation: Your layers match Maslow’s top tiers but go further by emphasizing active cultivation of inner peace, purpose, and spiritual awareness, not just potential states.
Relation: These are actionable practices that help a person reach Maslow’s top stages; Maslow describes what is possible, your framework explains how to get there.
7. Meta-Principles → Overarching Theme Across All Levels
Maslow: doesn’t explicitly include guiding principles; top stage implies alignment and integration.
Your framework: balance of acceptance and growth, love as integrator, inner transformation over external accumulation.
Relation: Provides an overarching lens for navigating all levels, adding intentionality and integration that Maslow leaves implicit.
Summary in Words:
Maslow provides a hierarchy of needs — a roadmap of what must be met for flourishing.
Your layered framework is a practical, holistic guide — a roadmap of how to cultivate flourishing across body, mind, relationships, meaning, and integration.
Maslow is mostly descriptive; your framework is operational and actionable, embedding skills, practices, and transformative work at each level.
Your framework also flattens the pyramid somewhat: biological, psychological, relational, and existential layers are interdependent, not strictly sequential.
The Law of Love 